Amy Boucher Pye

Author: Amy Boucher Pye

  • Review of a stunning memoir

    The Long Awakening

    9781441243041

    Imagine waking up after 47 days in a coma, not realizing that the summer had passed or that you’d had a baby. This is what happened to Lindsey O’Connor, a mother of four who gave birth to her fifth baby – a planned later-in-life pregnancy – then suddenly crashed and nearly bled out, her brain deprived of life-giving oxygen. Her doctors induced a coma to allow her brain time and space to heal, but the extent of damage she suffered had no one knew. The Long Awakening is the gripping and moving story of her slow emergence out of the space between life and death as she hovered just below the surface, longing to connect but unable to do so.

    But a miracle occurred, and though her family thought one tortuous night that she would die, she slowly came back to life. But she, asleep, missed the miracle. The thousands who prayed; the hundreds who brought around meals and cared for children and lent support: they witnessed it. But she, its focus, felt outside. Yet she knew her awakening was inexplicable and miraculous, so how could she even voice these feelings?

    And who was she now, having been so deconditioned that she couldn’t even stand up on her tip toes or breathe on her own? How could she care for her children? Love her husband? Bond with her baby, whose first bath and first feeds she missed? Who was she in terms of her career? As she mused, “I used to be a writer… Now I cannot even read. Those days are over, I thought, and lay thinking of who’d I been, wondering who I was now.”

    The road to recovery has been slow and long, but Lindsey has determined to “play the hand we’re dealt.” She writes lyrically, raising profound issues of identity, family and community, faith, mother/child bonding, and end-of-life medical ethics. Using her training in crafting journalistic narrative, she weaves together the pieces of those 47 days in the coma and the 107 days in hospital. I only wish she would have been more forthcoming with her faith; strikingly absent is the present of Jesus (but not God), although she calls herself “one who loves God fiercely.” Perhaps being a mainstream journalist in America made her reticent to enter the fray of faith-related discussions, which Stateside can turn tribal.

    One to read and ponder, especially in a book-club setting, for the issues the book raises are manifold. A reminder to us all to treasure the moments we’re given.

    (published by Revell, ISBN 978-0800723170)

  • Devotional of the week: Christ in all

    Yep, clearly the artists in my family are my dad and daughter, not me... (This is my creation, not my daughter's!)
    Yep, clearly the artists in my family are my dad and daughter, not me… (This is my creation, not my daughter’s!)

    Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. Here there is no Gentile or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all. Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. (Colossians 3:2–5; 9–11)

    Sadly, often in church life we fight battles with each other, sister against sister; brother against brother. Perhaps we think that we hold the whole truth and they fall short. Or a difference of opinion over a point of doctrine becomes the opening clash of a long and drawn-out war, which leaves lives bruised and relationships impaired. Or a matter of personality morphs into a heated battle that remains long in the memory of those involved.

    As the wife of a vicar, I’ve witnessed these spats between siblings, sometimes being wounded in the process. I don’t count myself as an authority on conflict resolution; nor do I claim to hold an infallible grasp on Truth. But we can see a way forward in our church family life through Paul’s letter to the Colossians. As we live out our redeemed lives, Christ is all and is in all. We can take off the old clothes, those old rags that hold the memory of conflict, and put on the clothes of Christ – compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, forgiveness, love.

    Wearing his garments, we are more able to live in harmony and peace with our sisters and brothers, especially if we remember that Christ sacrificed himself for them, as much as for us. As we live out of our new self, we can then move forward in unity, being freed from infighting and enabled to forgive as we seek to love and serve others and God.

    For reflection: “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (Hebrews 10:24–25).

  • Life in the UK: By your accent ye shall know them

    Lately PyelotBoy has been critiquing my pronunciation – “correcting” it to the British equivalent. Now I know some Americans who have lived in the UK for a long time have no problem with acquiring a mid-Atlantic accent. Some simply can’t help it. Some aspire to it, seeing it as a step up in terms of class (Received Pronunciation, of course).

    Photo credit: by AndreaMBC on Flickr
    Photo credit: AndreaMBC on Flickr

    Not me. I was happy to lose some of my nasal Midwestern inflection when I moved to Washington, DC when in my twenties, but a decade later I had come to terms with my identity, so changing how I spoke felt like a step too far. And yet, when I first moved to the UK I was painfully conscious about opening my mouth. Any foray into a shop would label me as other – as foreign – as soon as I uttered a word. So I would keep shtum (US: stay silent) if I could, and would wait for the look of pity or surprise when I asked for my change or said thank you.

    But my many years of living in the UK, especially my years in multicultural London, have cured me, thankfully, of this self-conscious standing outside of myself. In London, I’m just one of many accents, and frankly, not terribly interesting at that. In my church of 170 people or so, we have 20 nationalities representing the continents of Africa, the Americas, Asia, and Europe. A taste of heaven!

    Sometimes when I’m outside of London, however, the reality of being a Yank in Britain comes back to me in a rush. I spent some time writing in Eastbourne a few years ago, reveling in the quiet of a friend’s house and generally speaking to no one but my family by phone. The sole person I talked to was in the grocery store (UK: supermarket), and sure enough, the bloke asked me where I was from and how long I was visiting. Or when I visited a friend in Carlisle and we ordered pizza, the delivery person queried me about my accent.

    In some parts, I guess, I’m still an anomaly. But in my own home I thought I would not face questions or ridicule. Think again.

    What about you? Has your accent morphed over the years? For an amusing question-and-answer column in the Guardian about a New Yorker seeking to acquire a Southern English accent, see here. My advice? Don’t even try.

  • Cause for wonder – review of two books by David Adam

    wonder of the beyond FCRecently I became submerged in the writings of David Adam. A Church of England clergyman, he was for many years vicar on the Holy Island of Lindisfarne. Inspired by the Celtic people of Britain and Ireland, he writes poems, prayers, and reflections on the triune God who is with us.

    One of the things that struck me most about his writing is his emphasis on wonder. As we open our eyes to creation and those around us, we live in the moment and learn to experience God’s presence. For as he says in The Wonder of the Beyond, “God is here, God is with us, and above all, God is.” And yet, so often we find ourselves preoccupied, caught up in this or that as we flit from one thing to another – to our detriment. The result, as he says in The Path of Life, affects the whole of our lives: “A short attention span makes for shallow relationships, for poor perception and reception. This is as true with God as it is with each other.”

    Path of LightThe two books I’ve chosen are a good place to start with his writings. In The Wonder of the Beyond he tells stories from his life, from working in a coal mine at the age of fifteen, to his decision to become a vicar, to his whirlwind romance with this wife (they met and married within a week). But he recounts his stories for the purpose of waking up the reader to “a wonder-full world” – to the world that hosts the glory of God in our midst. He challenges us to really see the people and objects of creation in front of us – to give them our undivided attention. Then through creation and others we will see God.

    The Path of Life is a series of meditations on prayers from the Celtic tradition, and is thus helpful in personal and corporate prayer. Recently I used his meditations on Rune Before Prayer (rune meaning poem) during a retreat as a focusing prayer. I love how he meditates on each member of the Trinity and their unique attributes, bringing them alive to us.

    In closing, a quotation from The Path of Life to ponder: “If you are insensitive to the things that are around you, how can you hope to be sensitive to the unseen God?”

    The Wonder of the Beyond (SPCK, ISBN 978-0281063307)
    The Path of Life (SPCK, ISBN 978-0281060702)

     

  • Devotional of the week: Give thanks

     We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light. For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins (Colossians 1:9–14)

    Photo credit: woodleywonderworks on flickr
    Photo credit: woodleywonderworks on flickr

    A primary characteristic of the new life is a spirit of thankfulness. Here Paul and Timothy are writing to the church at Colossae, and in these opening verses they pray that the believers will live out their new life. Not only that they might be strengthened so that they might endure and be patient, but all the while “giving joyful thanks to the Father.”

    In the West today we so easily see what we’re missing, especially when advertising slogans continually reassure that “you’re worth it.” We might pine after physical things such as the latest smartphone or tablet. Or in our relationships – such as longing for a baby, to be married, for our kids to find fulfillment and so on. And yet when we stop and ponder all that we have, our outlook changes. We begin to wonder at the treasures we’ve already received. Our senses become open to beauty in all its places, even if just hearing the birdsong in a concrete jungle.

    Poets and philosophers have seen thanksgiving as an overriding virtue throughout the ages. For instance, GK Chesterton said in his A Short History of England, “I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” Good advice for the new life.

    Prayer: Triune God, change my spirit that I might give thanks in all things. Let me know how you pour out your love and mercy on me, making me clean.

  • Life in the UK: A cup of tea

    My son started drinking tea when he was around three years old. Inconceivable to me that a son of mine would latch on to this drink when so young, but hey, we live in Britain. It remains his favo(u)rite drink; he must have a cuppa (decaf, natch) before going to bed, as well as when he comes home from school.

    IMG_3554The British obsession with tea remains, even if some of the younger, cool set aren’t addicted. “I’ll put the kettle on,” is a common declaration when one gets home, and I’ve heard of couples interrupting their fights for a cuppa. (I wonder if as they sipped, the conflict intensified, with each person stewing over what to say next, or whether the hot drink soothed them and calmed things down.) Tea is served after church, in homes, to the workers who install new floors or radiators, to friends and family.

    Americans drink tea too, but they are known for their love of coffee. Me? I’m not a huge hot-drinks person, although since moving here I drink one or two cups of tea a day. Chai, mind you, and a decaf after dinner. Coffee? Nope; haven’t learned to like it.

    Why is tea so rooted in the national consciousness in the UK? The weather is an obvious reason. When you’re living in a climate where the damp gets into your bones, and you can’t get warm no matter how many hot water bottles you strew across your body or how many layers you pile over you, a hot cup of tea spreads its warmth from within.

    Another reason is rooted in history. The mighty British Empire had tea at its disposal, having introduced it to India. This little island loves its independence, so it makes sense to consume a drink that differentiates it from the coffee-loving Continent. Of course, the rebel colony now called the USA loves coffee for similar reasons – we dumped over that tea in Boston and have never looked back.

    And another reason must be culture. Various upper class women are named as the creators of the practice of afternoon tea; the one I’ve heard most often is Queen Victoria herself, who felt peckish between the long hours of lunch and the evening meal, calling for a cup of tea around 4pm. But online searches say that  Anna Maria, the 7th Duchess of Bedford of Woburn Abbey in Bedfordshire, was the originator. It’s not surprising that the upper classes came up with this custom, for tea used to be wildly expensive. I’ve been through country houses where they proudly display the ornate wood boxes where the tea was stored, to which only the lady of the house had the key.

    I think I’ll go make a cup of tea.

    How about you? Whether Brit or American or other nationality, do you like tea? Why or why not? If so, how many cups a day do you drink? Do you have a drinks routine, from which life cannot go on if you aren’t able to adhere to it?

  • Devotional of the week: New clothes

    You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in the true righteousness and holiness (Ephesians 4:22–24).

    383855472_512c98e947
    Photo credit: robe pattern by peagreengirl as found on flickr

    I used to have a garment that I called my “traveling sweater.” For some reason I deigned it the best and most comfortable item of clothing to wear on an airplane. But after many a journey, instead of being white, it turned slightly grey and shapeless, sporting some holes. Still I loved it, so much that my mom and sister finally had to recommend that I retire my favorite travel companion.

    Putting off the old self and putting on the new can feel like leaving behind a familiar way of life. Even if the former way of life leads to pain, heartache, angst, anger, and destruction, we fear what we might encounter in the new. Will we have fun? Will we be fulfilled? What will I have to give up?

    But as we don our new clothes in Christ, our minds and hearts are made new. We begin to see how misshapen our old clothes were; how tight they felt and how we couldn’t breathe in them. The trousers, in fact, gave us indigestion. Whereas our new clothes not only reveal who we really are, but they enable us to soar in freedom, truth, and holiness.

    In what might be the clearest passage about the old and new selves, Paul points out three imperatives: put off our old self; be made new in our minds; put on the new self. Elsewhere he speaks of living “in Christ,” which gives us the power and strength to live out these imperatives. As we do so, we will be “created to be like God,” which hearkens back to the Genesis account of creation. Through our continued donning of the new self we can live as God intended, with right living and holiness.

     

    Prayer: Lord Jesus, help me to cast off any clothing of the past that I need to leave behind. Renew my mind that I might put on my new self.

  • Life in the UK: Plumbing the depths

    A sentence I never thought I’d write: Yesterday my son got a new radiator.

    Growing up in Minnesota, I experienced a steady stream of heat in the winter. Hot air blown down the vents to my room in the basement. It was a few degrees cooler downstairs, but I didn’t mind. Bred in the North, heirs of northern Europeans, we were tough. And then I moved to Washington, DC, learned what the season Spring was with the delightful azaleas and dogwood blossoms, and lost some of my Midwestern steel. Yet the hot air kept blowing on me as I dwelled in another basement room, this time in a home with three other women.

    radiatorMy dreams for a Prince Charming came true but I didn’t realize that after the wedding, life in the UK would be so damp and cold. I had experienced cold, but never before the damp chill that sinks into your bones and refuses to leave. The kind that calls for endless cups of tea in the quest to get warm (not a consumer of hot drinks was I). But the honeymoon cushioned me, imparting to me a cozy flat in in Cambridge student accommodation, complete with a stunning power shower.

    And then to Surrey, and Nicholas’s first curacy. An American relative came to visit and squeaked, “Could you please put the heat on?” Nicholas wasn’t home and I didn’t know how to do it – heat came on twice a day, whether or not you needed it.

    Next to northwest London and single-glazed windows, with my vocabulary increasing even more (who knew to talk about glazings on windows!). One morning I asked the-Vicar-with-whom-I-sleep why the curtains in our bedroom were swaying back and forth. “Oh, that must be the draft.” But a shower had I, for Nicholas insisted that they install a power shower in the curate’s house. When the skilled church member showed me the fruits of his labors with pride, I swallowed my disappointment, burying the question bursting to come out: “That’s a power shower?”

    And onto north London, where we are now, with our lovely Victorian vicarage that slowly is becoming warmer each winter, thanks to Nicholas’s perseverance and the help of the diocese. Over the years, secondary glazing added to the windows. An extra layer of insulation in the loft (attic). Some new radiators downstairs. And yesterday, a new radiator for my son as we seek to get his room allergy-friendly. (I’m sorry to our eight former au pairs, who shivered in that room, that we didn’t get this done earlier.)

    Plumbing and heating. My gripes are first-world issues, I know. But how about you? Do you find joy in a shower that doesn’t qualify as an Irish mist, in which you need to jump around to get warm and wet? How cool is your house? How much tea do you consume?

  • Interview with Stormie Ormartian: The power of the written word

    A rerelease from Woman Alive, when I caught up with best-selling author Stormie Ormartian, who has impacted millions with her The Power of Praying books. Books have been profoundly important for her too… 

    Stormie 2Amy: I understand that three books were vital to your conversion, including the Gospel of John. What were they and how did they help set you free?

    Stormie Ormartian: The pastor who led me to the Lord knew which books I should read because they contained exactly what I needed to understand in order for my heart to be opened to the truth. He gave me the Gospel of John in a small book form which told me everything I needed to know as to who Jesus is and what He did for me and why I needed Him.

    The second book was The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis, about the reality of evil and the enemy’s plan for our lives. It, too, was exactly what I need to read because I was involved with occult practices and new age religions that denied the reality of evil.

    The third book was on the Holy Spirit, and that book was discontinued around the same time that I received the Lord. I know this because I gave my copy to a friend when she couldn’t find it in the stores and they told her it was no longer available. I don’t recall the name of the book, but having no prior knowledge or understanding of the Holy Spirit, it was eye opening for me to know that when I received Jesus the Holy Spirit would come to dwell in me and change me from the inside out. I wrote my book Lead Me, Holy Spirit on that very subject because I could not find one that talked specifically about how the Holy Spirit leads and transforms us. When I read those three books I had never heard any of that before and I knew what I was reading was the truth.

    After I read the books, my pastor asked me if I wanted to receive Jesus and I told him yes. Right away, I noticed a difference in my life. I had a feeling of peace, of being accepted, of being cleansed from all my past failure, of starting over with a clean slate. And I felt love, joy, and hope for the first time. I also had a growing sense of purpose, and I began to see a future for my life. As I grew in God’s Word, I learned to walk in His way. I became better able to make right choices. And with the Holy Spirit’s leading and enablement, I could resist falling back into old habits of doing things that were not God’s will for my life. As I moved into the deliverance and freedom He had for me, I gradually became free from depression, anxiety, and fear.

     

    Amy: The Power of a Praying Wife has been a bestseller for ten amazing years. How was the experience of writing that book? Did you ever think it would make such an impact for God’s glory?

    Stormie: I never dreamed when I was writing The Power of a Praying Wife that it would have the impact, sales, longevity, and life-transforming effect that it has had. Talk about the Lord having more for us than we can even think or imagine. I never imagined all this. When the book went number one on the bestseller list I called the president of Harvest House Publishing to thank him for all the hard work the company had done to make that happen and he immediately said, “We didn’t make that happen. No one can. Only God can do that.”

    It was a hard book to write because I had to share details about my marriage that I didn’t know if my husband was going to agree to. When he read it he asked me if I had to include the part about his anger. I said yes because that was the biggest issue in our marriage. I couldn’t pretend that it wasn’t. I was not writing a book about how to make a perfect marriage more perfect. Where would my credibility be if I left out the greatest struggle we had. And to his credit he willingly gave the okay to leave everything in as I wrote it.

    What amazed me about the book was although I knew that this way of praying worked for me, I was concerned about whether it would work for other women. That’s because it is a sacrifice on the wife’s part and I wasn’t certain that many women would be willing to make that sacrifice. But I was thrilled to see how they took to it immediately and were so willing to do whatever it took to make their marriages better and lasting. I thank God for all those precious women.

    Stormie Small (2)

     

    Amy: I’m assuming your painful childhood wasn’t conducive to much reading; is that right? Do you have any childhood favorites in terms of books, or those you read to your children?

    Stormie: I don’t remember being read to much as a young child, except for the Cinderella story. But when I started school I was extremely eager to learn how to read. And once I could read books on my own I never stopped reading every book I could get my hands on. My favorites were fairy tales, which I read one after another. I loved them. I lived in them. In fact, fiction became my way of escape from the sadness of my life, even on into adult years. After I came to the Lord, all I wanted was the truth. So I read only non-fiction from then on and started writing non-fiction books as well.

    I read to my children from the time they could sit up on my lap and be interested in the pictures. I read them every book I thought was appropriate for their age. Two of their favorites were The Little Engine that Could and Winnie the Pooh as well as little Bible stories that were just right for their ages. I read to them nearly every day of their childhood and they would always pick the books they wanted to hear. After they were skilled enough to read on their own they would have a quiet time with their books, reading some of them over and over again.

     

    Amy: Have you ever considered writing fiction?

    Stormie: I have been asked to write fiction from different companies and I haven’t done it yet because I have had so many non-fiction books on my heart that I had to get them written first. And I do love writing dialogue and description and telling a story. But I also love true stories like I wrote in The Miracle of Christmas about the birth of Christ. I have been praying about writing fiction in the future, so I am curious to see how the Lord leads me on this.

     

    Amy: Imagine you’re going on an upcoming journey and your only activity can be reading. What books would you read?

    Stormie: I don’t have to do much imagining about that because I am leaving on a much needed vacation with my husband for a week. And my absolute favorite activity is reading. I love books. I love to read. So I am planning what books I am going to take. I like autobiographies and biographies of political figures or great men or women of history, and books that help me to better understand the Bible. I also enjoy books on healthy living, especially the newest discoveries about how to eat right and take care of our bodies. I am allowing myself one hardback, one paperback, and a couple of books on my Kindle. I love the feel of a book, but I can take more if I put one or two on the Kindle as well.

  • Devotional of the week: An eternal perspective

    For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed instead with our heavenly dwelling, because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed instead with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. Now the one who has fashioned us for this very purpose is God, who has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come (2 Corinthians 5:1-5)

    A taste of heaven, from the altar at St. Peter's Basilica.
    A taste of heaven, from the altar at St. Peter’s Basilica.

    A couple of years ago, I ended our Christmas missive with a reflection on the fragility of life, for one close to us was killed in a car accident. I didn’t know that as I composed the letter, a beloved older friend was near death, having suffered a stroke. We often live in a state of denial, but for everyone, one day our earthly tent will be destroyed.

    Yet Paul here speaks to the Corinthians about longing for his heavenly dwelling, which God the Builder and Architect has created and which moths and rust will not destroy. It’s another variation of the already-not yet which we spoke of in previous weeks. We mentioned how we have been redeemed but are not yet completely sanctified; here we note that we groan on earth as we anticipate the wonders of heaven. Namely our rich communion with God.

    I love how Paul reverses the wisdom of the world with his phrase, “swallowed up by life” (in contrast to death being the great swallower). All the remnants of our old self – the mortal – will be swallowed up by the true and everlasting light and life in our heavenly dwelling. We will no longer be naked and ashamed, but clothed in a better outfit than we ever could have dreamed of.

     

    Prayer: Lord God, help me to live with an eternal perspective today, remembering that people and your word will be all that remains eternally. Plant in me the hope of heaven, which you promise will not disappoint.