Friendship Fridays: My sister, my friend

I thought it would be fun to kick off this series, following Sheridan Voysey’s foreword to Transforming Love last week, by sharing about my friendship with my sister. Sibling relationships can be intense and it’s not always guaranteed that sisters and brothers will be friends. Mine are:

My sister Beth has always been part of my life—when I arrived I uprooted her from her position as the only child. A few years later, when my brother was born, I took the middle place. Brothers and sisters can share a special bond, as I do with Paul, but there’s something unique about sisterly love.

Growing up, Beth was the trailblazer, the one to wear down our parents about when we could get our ears pierced, or wear makeup, or have later curfews. I benefitted from her quiet persistence—even though I was one of the last to wear makeup in my group of friends.

Beth kept up her independent streak and moved out at an early age. Not having her at home changed our relationship, although I didn’t realize it then. We no longer fought over who would take the first shower or who was using the phone. We grew apart somewhat, with me focused on the last years of high school and her launching into her nursing work and relationship with Dave.

Although Beth and I were never distant, geography during my university years and after meant we didn’t enjoy a day-to-day relationship. Interestingly, after marrying Nicholas, when I moved from Washington, DC, to England, I became much closer with my sister. Feeling bereft of my lively social and professional life while being thrust into an unfamiliar culture, I looked to Beth for companionship. I found her continued gentle spirit ready to listen, to connect, to offer counsel.

She appears in my early memories out of proximity, but in more recent years out of choice. Beth and I are different—she pours out her special expression of compassion and love through her nursing, now with hospice care, while I’m not great even when family members aren’t well. And I know she’d find speaking to a group not on her list of preferred activities. But we don’t have to be similar to love each other. I can always count on Beth—she won’t let me down. That we share a faith in our loving God gives me even more gratitude and joy.

Why not consider your own sibling relations, if you have them, or that of close cousins or childhood friends. How is your relationship with them? How could you strengthen it today?

Explore friendship with Jesus in Transforming Love. Find it – including a free copy of the introduction and first chapter – here.